Tuesday, August 03, 2010

When I grew up!!!

30s must be the most confusing decade in a man’s life. Every time he says that he has become old, he is reminded of his negative thinking in stern words by people of lesser age. Every time he sees people in their teens, he realizes that there is an entire generation bridging the gap between him and the ones in their teens. The self realization has yet not come of him being not so young and this is very well reflected in him missing a heartbeat every time he is referred to as “Uncle”. As the realization of widening in generation gap becomes clearer, the comparisons between”his days” and current generation, increases. The process starts as he touches 30 and goes on till….I don’t know as I am still pretty close to 30. But one of the stark differences I see between “my days” and these days is the ease at which the most sought after stuff during adolescent days, porn, is available. Forget about the real porn available at a mouse click, even the normal stuff available on multiple channels is something most of us couldn’t even imagine in our days.
For us, there was nothing called porn or pondy as it was and is fondly called. We relied upon the film magazines like Stardust and, Mayapuri. These magazines became really popular when the trend of posing topless on the cover pages of these magazines started. First an actress/ model would pose topless on the cover page, then there would be huge hue and cry about these photos and then the actress/model would rubbish all this hue and cry by saying “My photographs are not vulgar and suggestive. They are artistic and sensual”. I have yet not understood the difference between these two.
We didn’t have the privilege of lit-eroticas as well. We relied upon the Grihshobhas and Sarita where the columns – “Sharmiye mat, humse poochiye” (Do not feel shy, ask us) were most sought after. Chitrahaar showed pre-80s songs and movies on DD were not worth mentioning.
My first date with the porn was when I moved into college. My roommate told me that one of the guards in the campus showed porn movies at his house for Rs. 40/-. But I must not tell this to anyone as my roommate had worked really hard to dig out this secret and paid Rs. 10/- to a mess-worker to find out the name and address of our showman – that guard. It was supposed to be kept as a secret - The secret.
During the night, we silently slipped out of our room and marched towards our cinema hall – house of that guard. We took another batch mate, who was also made privy to this secret, along with us and reached our destination. The show started. But it was a silent movie. When we asked the guard to increase the volume, he refused telling us that his family was sleeping in the next room.
The movie ended in forty minutes. It was supposed to last an hour. We asked the guard to show that movie again for 20 minutes. He refused saying it’s not his fault if movie ended in 40 minutes. The fight started. We refused to pay the money. He threatened that he would register a complaint against us. We offered to accompany him in registering a complaint against us for not paying him Rs. 40/-to show us a porn movie. The fight ended there.
Anyhow, I had done something every adolescent male aspires to do at some point of his growing up. I had seen my first porn. Like most of the firsts in life, you never forget your first porn in life.
But real challenge for any adolescent male comes when he has to make his parents realize that he has grown up. I hope you get the context you mean. As explained above, comparison between programs on TV in those days and these days would be quite similar to comparing Late Nirupa Roy to Rakhi Sawant. But slowly things started changing. First half of 90s witnessed an era full of vulgar songs. Vulgarity was soon packaged differently and presented as erotic stuff during second half of 90s.
While cable TV had yet not entered most of the houses, DD2 was easily available and so was Ek se badh kar ek on DD2. For first time in our life, we were seeing fresh new songs of unreleased/soon to be released/just released movies/music videos in Ek se badhkar ek. In those days, Ila Arun came up with her music video, Nigodi badi harami hai which portrayed so many skimpy clothed girls that one found it impossible to remove his eyes off TV. But watching it in front of the family was really embarrassing. Most of the TV sets didn’t have remote in those days hence going all the way to the TV and switching the channel made it more embarrassing. On the other hand, there were hardly any options to switch over. All you could do is to switch off the TV. We always remained confused – whether to watch it or not. While the video was indeed vulgar, “We are grown enough to watch it” was the thought that always crossed our minds. I always prayed whenever that video came on TV, I wasn’t accompanied by anyone.
Soon, cable TV made an entry into my house. Star Movies of pre-BJP sponsored censorship era started. I had also, slowly though, started to change a little bit. I wasn’t really shy of watching something on TV in front of my family unless it really crossed the limit. Rarely anything did cross the limit. While my mother rarely watched TV, I always competed with my father for watching TV. Although our interest was pretty much the same, cricket, sometimes it differed and he always dictated the terms. I remember he asked me to go to sleep in a strong voice, when I was 14 years old, while watching Mera Naam Joker.
But times had changed now. I was an adult. And finally one night he did realize it.
Our cablewala was showing Pretty Women. I had heard a bit about the movie. He had seen it earlier. As the movie started, both of us kept our eyes on the TV hoping that the other one will go away. It was one of his favorite movies and he didn’t want to miss it. I was also in no mood to miss the movie as well. So we kept watching with one eye on TV and one eye on the chair next to us. It went on for 15 minutes or so. None of us was willing to wink. My father was expecting me to show a grown up behavior and leave. I was expecting him to realize that I had grown up. As 15 more minutes passed, he winked. He got up from his seat and said, “Switch off the TV when movie is over. And sleep early. I know you are on leave but that doesn’t mean you sleep at 1 and get up at 11”.
He left.
I jumped.
I had realized that my father had realized that I had grown up. I was old enough now, in his eyes, to watch a movie which had an A certificate. KESA (Kanpur electricity supply authority) didn’t like my joyous mood and cut the power of entire area. Power got restored next morning. Needless to say I couldn’t see the movie. I haven’t seen it till date. But it didn’t matter. I had achieved what I had to.


Alpachra said...

I still remember arguing with my Mom that the song from Khalnayak "choli ke piche kya hai" is not vulgar but as per the demand of the situation in movie......

Spiff said...

This is precisely why i dont like Arun Jaitly

Yayaver said...

@Alpachra, ""choli ke piche kya hai" is not vulgar but as per the demand of the situation in movie......". that is pretty interesting !

crazy devil said...

nice read

Dreamer said...

Once u realised, u have become an adult, u made sure that u watched all adult movies (English or Hindi) made from 1978 to 2010.

Anonymous said...

Vibhash, looking for an account of, when u first 'did' it..!!