ZNMD – Movie Review!!!

(Warning: Spoilers Ahead!!!) ZNMD is a classic, an epic, a true master piece of art. It’s a tale of friendship and love. It’s a tale of human emotions - the joy, the tears, superhuman bravery, and natural fears. It’s an extremely well written, superbly directed showcase of movie making. I am sure ZNMD is going to go down as one of the best movies ever.

The story starts with three different people struggling from different issues, how they meet and become friends, their love lives, and how it all pans out beautifully in the end.

Foreign Actor (FA) is dark, definitely not tall, and not so handsome young man in his 40s who is sick of his family. His parents, both noted movie personalities in India, want him to follow their path. FA realizes that it’s not his cup of tea and fears ending up like his dear friend Lover Boy pretty soon. His father, being a writer, is master of using his pen. His mother, being a politician, has mastered using sword. FA knows that in the debate of pen being mightier than the sword or vice versa, the party that is always going to lose, is him. So he runs away from his house to find his own life.

Heated Ration (HR) is a definitely not dark, tall, and handsome young man in late 30s. Every male in HR’s family became bald as soon as he touched 15. HR is well past his 30s and yet had not turned bald. This was generating animosity amongst his family members for him. In addition to this, HR’s dad wants HR to grow up and out of the safety of family business. “Stop sucking your thumb HR. Grow up.” HR cannot help it if God has blessed him with an extra thumb. HR runs away in order to save his life.

Abhor Duel (AD) is a dark, tall and definitely not handsome young man from wrestlers’ family. His uncle and elder cousin brother are real wrestlers whereas younger cousin brother pretends to be a wrestler. But the biggest wrestler in the family is his cousin sister. They run a wrestling club known as Apne. AD’s uncle wants him to be part of this club but AD belongs to a different league. He hates fighting with other men. He wants to love them – so what if this love needs to be made. He wants to fly like a free bird.

All of them read an ad in the news paper – Zintha (Z) wants to hire new cheerleaders for her T20 team for the next season. Z was one of the sexiest bollywood extra in her days. She bought a team in world’s leading T20 league but her team fell flat in last year. “Team looked too sad. They need to be more cheerful. Your hugs are not working anymore.” was the reason given for team's failure. Hence Z wanted to hire fresh, energetic, enigmatic cheerleaders for her team. The trials for cheerleaders were to happen in Jalandhar – a town where people don’t do anything other than making IT large. May be that’s why Z chose this town.

FA, HR an AD land up in Jalandhar. They meet in the hotel lobby where everyone is staying and instantly discover a liking for each other. Soon, they become friends. Combined together, they pass and fail the criteria of perfect man in totality– tall dark and handsome. FA & AD are dark, AD & HR are tall, and HR is handsome. FA is not tall, HR is not dark, and AD is not handsome. They complete the entire spectrum ranging between good-looking men to ugly men. All they need to find out now is 3 female partners who will complete their group – each group has to have 3 male and 3 female cheerleaders. They need to be ready before they get their chance to present themselves before Z. Every group gets just one chance because right at the start of the competition, the message has been conveyed clearly – Zintha na milegi dobara (ZNMD).

Post intermission, the story at the other end of sexual divide begins.

Kal-Ki Kocchin (KK1) is an NRI trying to make her mark in Indian film industry. Her struggle becomes a horror show as soon as her boy friend’s brother develops a strange disease. As soon as he sees KK1, he starts shouting Daab-Ang, Daab-Ang (press body part, press body part) while lifting his shirt in a strange manner. KK1, taking it as a lewd pass, gets harassed and runs away.

Khararnaak Khauf (KK2) is scared of her ex boyfriend who has a history of beating up his girl friends after breakup. KK2 has just broken up with this boyfriend of her.

KK1 and KK2 also see Z’s ad and reach Jalandhar. They meet up FA, HR, and AD and the love story begins. Or rather, love stories begin.

KK1 falls in love with FA who loves KK2. Being not so tall himself, FA has a liking for tall women. But KK2 has just had a bad experience while being in a relationship with a short man. So her preference is tall men now. She loves AD but AD loves HR. Having grown up in a family which is world famous for its manhood, AD has developed a natural liking towards masculinity. After all, it’s all about loving your family. But HR loves KK1 because of her short height.

“Whatever we don’t have, we seek it in our friends. This remains one the biggest driver for friendship.” The message is conveyed clearly at the start of the movie.

They call themselves Pentagon.

You might have seen numerous love triangles but director of ZNMD has taken the loves stories to a new dimension – she has worked on a pentagon which has its one side shifted diagonally. It’s a wonderful capture of human emotions. Many a times you might feel like shedding your tears and wiping your nose. Like when FA comes to AD to share his emotions about KK2 and AD proposes to FA. Or when KK1 tells KK2 about her failing love life, realizes their conflict of interest, starts fighting with KK2, and realizes that they are friends from their last birth. They kiss and make up.

While they all are lost in their love pentagon, day of final trial comes sooner than expected. With just one day to go for the final trial, all 5 of them are missing the most basic need – 6th member of their team. What do they do now? A team of five will not qualify. Even if they hire some random female, it is not likely that she will gel well with them. Chances are high that they will fail in this competition because the biggest binder – love, would be missing for the 6th member. Second chance is just not allowed. After all Zintha na milegi dobara.

Director fails to answer the question – what if the 3rd female falls in love with someone in the group. May be she didn’t want to create a hexagon; hence the question is left unanswered.

To make it large, one can wait for the next life. Love and friendship is all that matters. But with only 5 members, they just cannot take part in the competition. Now all of them would have to go back to their respective lives. They have become so used to of each other that saying goodbye will sound more difficult than saying “Why are you so silent today” to Siddhu.

Emotions just put the 70mm screen on fire. Tears flood it. Everyone loves someone. If anyone says a yes, it will surely break a heart. If one heart breaks, all will follow the suit. Saying no will definitely cause havoc. Hence they all decide to say yes to everyone. They all make love, collectively, together, in their hotel room. The scene has been shot beautifully.

Z, who is on a secret vigil to check out on the participants, happens to have a peak-a-boo in pentagon’s room. She has just come out of a breakup and is weak at heart. Seing the ocean of love in which Pentagon is swimming, her heart starts jumping. She is into tears. The thought that pentagon will need to be broken, just because of some stupid rule, shatters her. She offers to be the 6th member of their group so that they are not disqualified.

The trial begins. Pentagon wins. They all are buoyed. But the decision of the judges, which is deemed unfair, is challenged by the other teams. The matter goes to Supreme Court. Supreme Court comes out with its verdict. Pentagon will need to perform in front of the court. Court will compare their live performance with the video footage of other groups’ performance. There is one condition – they need to find out a 6th member for the performance in front of the court. When the group asks the court if they can take Z as their 6th member, the court refuses saying Zintha na milegi dobara.

Movie ends but not the tears. They will be shed either till the eternity or if Zintha meets dobara. Maybe we will have to wait for the sequel.


Sachin Gulhane said…
Nice creative work of sheer imagination and ample free time in office :-) .. But good read … Wish you could use your talent (?) for some more productive work
Spiff said…
sounds good...need to watch the movie
Dreamer said…
I agree with spiff. You should watch the movie before writing a review on it

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