Tuesday, April 24, 2012

The Birth Dates!!!

I am a bit of a believer in horoscopes. I also believe in numerology. In addition to this, I also believe that tarot card readers can tell what you are going to get bitter gourd dinner if you had a tiff with your wife in the morning, stars do play a part in you getting relief every morning in toilets and there are unseen forces in this world which make you unknowingly dig your nose while you are standing in front of your eye candy who you fancy. There exists a force which is responsible for every action, inaction, interaction and transaction that happens in this world. Like men’s gaping eyes whenever they get even glimpse of a female’s you-know-what, this force remains uncontrollable.

So on this auspicious day when 39 years ago God reincarnated himself on this planet and blessed our beloved motherland, I decided to check some dates. My research confirmed my belief in the roles planets play in shaping our past, present and future.

Need I say more about the gentleman I am referring to? 24th of April may well be declared World Cricket Day in India because the man whose 100th 100 remains the most covered act by media since Uday Chopra’s retirement , Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar was born on this day. Although Sachin must not have been very happy with Uday’s retirement because according to him, retiring on high is selfish. Uday was definitely on a high when he announced his retirement in some pub. Rumor has it that he had just finished his 13th peg of Old Monk, Uday I mean.

So I decided to check some dates. One of my relatives and a very close friend shares his birthday with Sachin. Like Sachin, he is doing wonderfully well in his profession and I pray from the bottom of my heart that he keeps doing it.

Best guess about Shakespeare’s date of birth is 23rd of April. Not surprising that these two legends were born around the same time. Who knows, their time of birth might have been separated by a few hours or few minutes.

Shakespeare died on 23rd of April. It is said that he was sick for almost a month before he died. Conventional wisdom says that his mind may not have been at his best because his sick health, as it normally does, would surely have decreased its immense capabilities. Just before 23rd of April, his literary genius mind must have come down to a level way below normal and closed to the levels of masala writers we see these days. Chetan Bhagat was born on 22nd of April.

Till the end of IPL season 4, MSD was considered to be the best thing to have happened to Indian cricket after the debacle of WC2007. His courage was applauded all over the country for not surrendering to Poonam Pandey’s threat of going nude in the event of India’s victory in WC11. Yes, it does need courage. Imagine your effort of winning the world cup being awarded by making you see a naked Poonam Pandey. What if she actually turns out to be a he? It would have been like definition of an unfortunate man’s life – Life is a punishment for once coming first among millions. MSD braved the fear and sealed it with a Six.

Jokes apart, MSD remains India’s second best captain I have seen in my 23 years of cricket viewing. The best captain was born a day after MSD. Yes. MSD’s and Dada’s birthdays are juxtaposed to each other – 7th and 8th July respectively. See, planetary motions prove that on those days, our planet gets rays from other planets which help in cultivating leadership skills. If I was Sybill Trelawney or Rameej Raza, I would have predicted that India’s next captain would be the one who was born on 6th of July.

6th December remains one of those days which changed modern India forever. For the benefit of those who may not be aware, please check it on internet. Nope. I am not talking about what happened in 1992. I am talking about what happened in 1988. Yes. Our beloved, only second Indian cricketer to be knighted by people of India, normally known as Sir RJ although now people are pushing it to Lord RJ, Ravindra Jadeja was born on 6th December 1988. Sir RJ is a legend. Few even believe that he wasn’t born but was dropped directly on this planet from God’s own closet. Only if he was born a decade ago, he would have been the first Indian cricketer to be knighted by the people of India. Interestingly, the first ever Indian cricketer to be knighted by the people of India, the living legends who is still living up his name, Sir Ajit Agarkar was born 2 days before Sir Jadeja i.e. 4th of December. The best part about Sir Ajit is, he hasn’t changed since last 14 years – still bowls at good pace, still bowls at least one boundary ball per over and still starts a new over with a wide. And whenever he is hit, which happens very frequently, he still gives that look to all of us - This is not my fault. This is cheating. I didn’t know that batsman he supposed to use the piece of wood for hitting the ball. Did I ever use it in Australia?

As they say, class is permanent.

So all you ladies and gentlemen looking to start a family, looking to bring a new life to this planet and hoping your newborn will turn out to be a multifaceted, multi-talented super hero without wearing his undergarments over his/her pants, I have given you a key to surest success. Alter your plans, reserve your energy, keep building your stamina and improve your health. The time to do it this year is gone. Wait for 2013 provided Mayans are proved to be wrong. Make sure your baby making activities are between Mid-February and Mid-April. Chances are high that you will be blessed with a son like Sir RJ or Sir Ajit.

Standard Disclaimer: Pun intended. No offence meant to anyone.

1 comment:

Spiff said...

Sir RJ and Ajit are in a class of their own. That para deserved a separate blogpost